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BECAUSE RELATIONSHIPS MATTER

IMG_3522Reconstructing Intimacy…
Broken Windows of the Soul
Donald A. Lichi, Ph.D.
Psychologist
Emerge Ministries Inc.
See resources shared at bottom of this page (handouts, power points, etc.)

The enemy will seek to build strongholds in your life and enforce them in silence.
God is faithful to provide a way of escape so that we do not have to fall into sin.

Remember….because of Christ, you are…
Lovable
Valuable
Forgivable
Changeable
Never Alone

Lynn shared about his personal experience of losing his marriage, family, ministry, finances. Just because you have a broken window doesn’t mean you’re headed to the salvage yard. Failure’s not final.

Introduction

Avoiding Extremes
– Addictions are merely chemical and biological
– Addictions are solely spiritual
– Addictions are only a lack of willpower
– Addictions are solely “demonic” problems

A Healthy Way to View the Body

Your body is God’s gift to you
Your body will be raised from the dead.
God relates to human beings as body persona and as sexual persona
God has created our bodies to be bonded to the sources of our pleasure.

All kinds of potential addictions:
Alcoholism, gambling, drugs, nicotine, exercise, sex, cannabis, meds, etc.

“Broken Windows”
Put dilapidated car in street. Within 10 minutes people started taking it apart. Stripped it.

An abandoned car sends a message: ‘Help Yourself”

Took another abandoned car, licenses plate off, put hood up, no one touched for a week until he broke one of the windows. Within 10 minutes, an upper middleclass family took stuff from the car.

This is what happens in our culture – litter begets more litter. Graffitti begets more graffiti. Social disorder follows when people think no one is home.

Rudy Juliani read the article – zero tolerance policy: for window washers, toll jumpers, small infractions, major crime began to fall.

Something as seemingly small as a broken window – sends a signal.

Consequences of small-scale neglect:
Community, church, schools, home, family, heart: nobody cares.

Malcolm Gladwell:
Attend to the small things to start a movement in a positive direction.

Problem of Pornography: taps into all three major classifications of drugs:
Stimulants
Hallucinogens
Barbiturates

Leaves with: guilt, shame.

Care for my Heart … Developing True Intimacy
Strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats
Your decisions determine your destiny.

Conversation with President of Moody Bible Institute
List of consequences for moral failure
List of ministry colleagues who had had a moral failure.

When am I Most Vulnerable?
• When I haven’t spent much time with god.
• Not enough rest
• Life is difficult
• During times of change
• After significant victory
• Internally feeing hopeless
• Insecure
• Broken
• Angry

Vulnerable
• Hungry
• Angry
• Lonely
• Tired

Fixing Broken Windows

Purpose of the Spiritual Disciplines
*Close and regular relationship with God
* Allows us to grow and be strengthened

Nature of Temptation
To be tempted is not a sin
Begins before we are aware
Holy Spirit provides a warning and way of escape (I Cor. 10:13)
Deal with temptations early on

When we sin there are consequences.

ID triggering mechanisms
Define effective substitute behaviors.

Where are my ‘Broken Windows’?
What minor broken windows have I left unattended?
What has the Holy Spirit been saying to me?
Have I developed a ‘neighborhood watch program’ for my heart?

Making it Personal
Triggers
When/where is temptation most likely to occur?
Bored, Anxious, Depressed (BAD)

Small victories:
Talk to leaders, spouses, friends

Resources Shared:
Compassion Fatigue Self assessment
CompassionFatigueTheCostofCaring Rev 10.14
cost of caring.compassion fatigue
PUT OFF THE OLD SELF.PUT ON THE NEW SELF.doc
old self.new self.cont.

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